Let’s talk

We never really stop “coming out”.

It is something that becomes a regular part of everyday conversation. After all, it is our responsibility to disprove the assumption we never played a part in imbedding in a stranger’s mind, right? It is the real never ending story. Frustrations aside, we have gained access to one of the most highly efficient means of filtering. Our innate orientation unknowingly taps into the most advanced personality flaw detector in the social spectrum.

I cannot tell if this insight is a power or a weakness.

Perhaps it is both.


Extreme Anti-extremism

Protestors are given a bad rap; ridiculed for expressing passionate detest.

Meanwhile, those who do nothing to communicate their dismay other than the occasional social media rant or breakfast conversation, are considered to be more tolerable, sensible, and respectable individuals.

Funny, isn’t it? We look kindly upon those with empty complaints and look down upon the minority who care to put into action what the majority simply use as dinner banter.

I’m not talking about those people who shove their beliefs down your throat (that’s a separate article entirely). What I’m trying to say is that branding inaction acceptable and endorsing the ideology that freedom of speech can only be practiced amongst your “closed caption group” is perhaps the reason we have something negative to say in the first place…

…still believe the protestors are the extremists?


A Silent Soliloquy 

Why should I have to hide that part of my identity to save people the “discomfort”?

I’m not comfortable & I’m not safe.

Your friends and family tell you to be an individual, but never think to structure conversations to permit that individuality.

“Have you got a BOYfriend?”

“We need to find you a MAN.”

“Is that your GAY friend?”

So, by the time we’re ready to announce that which should not require a declaration, you’ve already crafted an identify for us that shifts our “announcement” to a “re-introduction”.

“My name’s Hayley. You’ve known me for a while, but your immediate assumptions moulded me into a shape that I’m now responsible for breaking down.”

Everyone, please be conscious of the way in which you interact with the people in your life.

YOU have been unintentionally constructing their identify for them & now THEY have to undergo a process of deconstruction.

What’s more, they kept your projected image because it was accompanied by love & acceptance.

Now, all they have is themselves, and that’s not a familiar face anymore.

Should I have to hide my identity to make you feel more comfortable?


But you can’t hear me.

I’m bi myself.


Coming from Darwin & Dawkins 

Coming out.

Of what?

From where?

Where the hell was I before?

How have I emerged from a place I didn’t know I existed?

A place I can only assume didn’t actually exist until I strayed from “the norm”…

A label you didn’t know needed to be created for me, until you realised you couldn’t accept or understand me without it.

Some kind of an “explanation” for my identity-

A requirement that doesn’t apply to you;

you and all of your straight edges.

I need a badge and you need nothing because you fulfill an assumption and I fulfill a sense of unfamiliarity requiring a name.

I’ve turned into a “something” needing “figuring out” by people who are not figured out, but incidentally do not need to justify their innate orientation to the world like I do.

Coming out.

From where?

Who was I before?

I am “me” yesterday, today and tomorrow.

So, why is “me now” different to who I was yesterday, simply because the person I actually am is not who you assumed me to be?

Assumptions, labels, and preconceptions are your flaws, not mine.

Who’s coming out?

You are.

You’re coming out as judgemental,

I’m just coming.